Do Plants Wear Panty Hose ?

This morning as I was cleaning out my purse I found a panty hose sock provided by the store where I had been trying on sandels. Stupid little thing. As I was about to pitch it I said wait just a minute panty hose-panty hose.! Now gardeners know how great panty hose are for tieing up plants and my tomatos are screaming for some help. Lots and lots of vine. Yes, I know from the gal famous for her sucker pinching skills. Well, I kind of forgot to tell you there was a pretty good time laspe where I didn't get to the tomato patch to sucker. My supply of old ratty panty hose is long gone. Wearing panty hose is just not part of my lifestyle now. Besides now it is fashionable to go with out panty hose. You just spray tan and go, even in the winter. Oh my gosh proper ladies would never hear of such a thing. So I am excited to go to the tomato patch and say look what I have a dangle the precious pany hose sock before them. Alas it is only one. Hmmmm maybe I should go shoe shopping again. Very very tempting. Now fancy farmerete don't even think such thoughts. Aren't you ashamed of yourself?

Ah a sweet garden scent

I really hate deadheading flowers, but there is one garden task I love to do, what I call "suckering" the tomato plants. It's where you pinch off the newly forming vine in between 2 already formed vines in that perfect little "v". I know there is better terminology for this but it is far too late for me to say it any better. Frankly, I think it is an art and I can do it perfectly having a keen eye for those little suckers. It's kind of like diagraming sentences in English class. I was always very good at that, but never really knew how it helped in learning the parts of sentences. Many of my classmates really struggled with this task. So suckering tomato plants is kind of like that, I know it cuts down on the vine so more energy will go into producing bigger tomatos, but if you miss a few it is not the end of the gardening kingdom. I just like to do this. When I come in from the tomato patch, my daughter will say" You have been in the tomato patch again I can smell them on you. Ah, the sweet smell of fresh, green tomato leaf essense. A fragrance company called Demeter has all kinds of interesting scents and by golly they have one called"Tomato". Tomato. Tamata, maters hmmmmmmmmmmm. slurp. Love tomatoes? check out this blog by a 95 year old from Knoxville Tennessee. tomatogardeningwithhdad.blogspot.com

Sex in the Garden

Finally the foliage has sprung forth in my garden. The green peppers are tall and will probably fall over from top heaviness. The squash is looking great but alas it bears no fruit. At first I thought it had a fungus, but the foliage was growing lush and beautiful. Then peeking underneath I saw a bee, a beautiful buzzing bee and I realized that was maybe the first bee that had touched the tender flowers. Oh sweet tenderness. Later that evening flipping through a magazine there in front of me was the tentilating secret, " How to polinate your non-fruit bearing squash." Because of the bee shortage ( I knew that) your plants may not be receiving the polination that the bees provide by skipping from the male to the female flower. To determine the male flower look for a long slender stem and then find the female flower which will have a slight bulb at the base. Take a small paint brush or q-tip and transfer the yellow powder like pollen from the male flower to the female flower."Yikes right there in black and white, sex in the garden" Oh my. The next morning I rather sheepishly picked up some q-tips and headed to the garden. This is so embarrasing I thought. I looked under the leaves and to my great relief I saw fruit! I dropped the q-tips and ran to the house.

Why Gardening is Like Potty Training

Lately I have been following Facebook posts about attempts and trials of potty training my adorable great nephew. My experience is, "it ain't gonna happen until it happens". I realized that is kind of like gardening. I hate to admit that my garden this year is pathetic. One of the reasons is I got impatient and planted things too soon. In my neck of the woods that means after Derby Day, the beginning of May at my old Kentucky home. I planted things too early and I think the rains washed the seeds away or it was too cool on their tootsies. I planted my tomatoes and they just stood there in defiance like, "woman it is too early and too cool we are not going to do anything for ya!". But, "drum roll", I had my first ripe tomato on June 25th. I have never had one ripen that early. Of course I think it was the size of a grape when I planted it, and besides that it is a yellow tomato. Not my favorite, but I planted one lone yellow tomato plant for the less-acid eaters in my family. Yes gardening and potty training are a lot alike. It ain't going to happen until the time is ripe, ur......right.

Helpful Hints

I disgress today from my long family story to share my real purpose to begin blogging. Sharing hints and hoping to receive your tried and true garden and yard helps. It will soon be time for yummy corn on the cob. If you had the space to grow your own or find it at the farmers market get the pot of water boiling. But wait don't throw out that hot boiling water after the 12 minutes. Control yourself for a few more minutes before you slatter on the butter. Carefully carry the pot of hot water out to a week patch and pour on the weeds. They will die. Especially great for grass and weeds growing in sidewalk and driveway cracks. Any pot of hot water will do, but just trying to make double duty of the water from your corn boil.

Double Dating and Dirt

Now Kenny, don't be so shy. She is a nice girl and besides she is Oliva's cousin. Sam, a friend of Kenny's was trying to talk him into a double date with Thelma. Sam and Kenny where neighbors both growing up on farms but had heard the call of distant lands and joined the army. Don 't know how Sam finally talked shy Kenny into the date, but it happened and Kenny fell in love with the browned haired Thelma and they where married. If Kenneth ever had a reason to hate farm life it would certainly be justified, because early in his career his Dad pulled him out of the army claiming hardship to have him come back and help on the farm. But finally Kenneth again was able to get back in the army and continue his career of being a helicopter instructor serving in World War II and the Korean Conflict. One of the smartest things Kenneth ever did was marry that little brown haired girl named Thelma, and I think probably one of the next smartest things was to visit Mr. Dunaway for a little purchase. " Mr. Dunaway, it would do me the honor of purchasing about 5o acres of your pasture, the western portion with the clump of woods." It was done. There was land for Kenneth and Thelma. Someday they might need this pasture of Dunaway dirt.

Thanks are due

I want to thank my daughter, Jennifer for doing all the fancy stuff on my blog. She wandered in the yard taking pictures and did all that fancy composing and lettering. I have no idea how to do that but she is very talented and encouraging. Honey, Mama may fix you a dirt pie for supper.